The "Girl Gamer" Survival Guide
Redefining the Girl Gamer
by Sarah Schutz 
For the first installment of our girl gaming library we decided it would be apropos to address this mystifying definition of a girl gamer and how to become one. A girl gamer is obviously just that: a girl who games. Girls who game have typically fallen into one of several distinct categories: hot hardcore gamer chick who games, hot gamer chick who doesn’t game and nerdy gamer chick who games – and unfortunately no one notices her. The sad truth is that most of these boobilicious blonde gamer chicks only exist to draw men gamers to certain websites or to certain games (though a few rarities do exist). Like many girl gamers or gamers who happen to be girls, I am beginning to question what this “girl gamer” category means and if it even needs to exist. My ultimate conclusion is that while we do not need an independent category necessarily, since we often play the same games following the same rules, we do need a space in which to talk about games and discuss the direction of the gaming industry for our population. Most sites out there are male-driven and either stomp on the notion of girls who game or ignore their existence altogether. When we play multiplayer, we either get pissed on, pitied or disbelieved – as if it even matters. Most games are not created for us, but with the male gamer in mind, and our demographic is rarely factored. And the truth is, at times, girls do play different games or play the same games differently. So what do we do about this categorical imperative? Do we resist? Comply? I suggest we embrace it, redefine it and consider what we want the definition of girl gaming to entail. I say screw the status quo, defy the category, and just play games.
Consider the facts.
According to the Electronic Software Association, women make up 38% of gamers. That’s no small chunk. And the majority of women in that 38% are above the age of 18. To me this demonstrates that while children (mostly boys) are handed video game controllers and girls are handed dolls, women often later in life choose to game. Women are beginning to cast off predefined stereotypes and consider a typically male pastime.
Based on our obvious existence and the evidence that girl gaming as a population and category will persevere, I offer my following observations and suggestions to make it in a boy’s world.
Embrace The Sims, but have the courage to walk away
There is some truth to rumors. Girls have generally been known to play only certain sorts of games, namely sim games or community based games. Women do tend to be more social in the online word, so often embrace games that allow them to communicate with others. The appeal of organization, decorating and shopping found in many simulation games often appeals to girls more than guys. Now the question is, “What came first? The girl or the advertising?” We may never know the answer to this question. While many girls do play games like The Sims, it is not quite clear whether it is because this is the genre of choice, or because these games have just been marketed more heavily towards women. Other genres, including but not limited to first person shooters and role-playing games, increasingly have more to offer to the female gamer, yet they are still being marketed towards the guys. I encourage girl gamers to breed their love for The Sims and community based “games” such as Second-Life, but step outside your comfort zone and you may find something you like. And then the game industry might listen.
Use gender bias to your advantage.
Men have been using gender bias to their advantage for centuries. Now it’s our turn. Girls are always given an automatic handicap when playing video games. Yeah, it sucks. Now use it. Your new boyfriend won’t expect you to do a melee sneak attack. Some female gamers are of the belief that we need not proclaim our gender. I’m proud to be a woman and proud to be a gamer. It makes me stand out. If they make incorrect assumptions, it usually gives me the advantage. And hell, why hide it? By not proclaiming it, you’re only admit it’s a weakness. Don’t think of being a girl as a disadvantage. You are given a unique perspective on a one-dimensional fan base.
Know your rhythm
If you’re not yet a gamer, a convenient gateway drug aside from The Sims seems to be rhythm games. With the advent of DDR and more recently Guitar Hero and a plethora of karaoke games, girls everywhere are offered a fairly simple way to get into games, as long as you’ve got rhythm. Rhythm games are increasingly becoming more popular with the girls and make for great party games. If keeping a beat isn’t your thing, go for the games that interest you. If you’re looking for more casual interactive gaming, take a look at the Wii. Sometimes it’s hard to dive right in to those first person shooters right away. Where do these kids get the time to get so damn good at Halo?
Challenge the stereotype
Practice! Be good. Compete
All this being said about casual gaming, embracing your girliness and playing what you like, this is a site for all girl gamers and myself being of the more hardcore variety, I am encouraging all girls to hone their skills. We are here to advocate for the girl gamers in the gaming industry, so we must have more of a presence in the gaming world. Practice makes perfect. And perfection commands respect.
From mmo to fps
Gamers game . . . obviously. As I said, try out everything. Don’t be afraid to tip your toes in the water. Renting is a great way to experience all sorts of games. Don’t just play what is advertised on the main page of your quintessential gaming cite. Read various magazines. Find the indie game you love. And not to toot our own horns, but we plan on bringing a lot of the games that just don’t get enough attention to the forefront. ‘Cause just like us girl gamers, a lot of games are misunderstood. And like us, if they don’t have the most amazing graphics and physics engine, they may just have a plot line to offer.
Get social
Human beings are social creatures. And women tend to have a knack for the outwardly interactive. Games are often considered secluded efforts, but not anymore. With MMOs and online gaming communities like Xbox live, you often end up being more social – or at least having more conversation – in your living room than out at a bar. Use your community to your advantage to excel at games.
Represent!
The key to getting our voices heard is to be active in the gaming community. Talk about games. Buy games. Rent games. Get involved in gaming communities (like ours!). If the industry knows we are out there and buying games, they will listen. If we show that we are a real part of this community, we can’t be stereotyped anymore.
Know thine self – who is the girl gamer or, more specifically, who are you?
Lastly, ignore all of my prior advice. Do it your way. There is no “girl gamer,” only girls who play games. But we do play. And we deserve a spot in this gaming community where we aren’t bombarded by a skewed view of gaming that ignores our existence or turns us into something we’re not. We may game like the boys, but we’re not the boys. And we just want a space to be ourselves . . . and to be recognized as gamers . . . however they are defined . . . but that’s for another time . . .
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I agree that we can use the fact that we are girls to our advantage. Yet, the question will forever remain: How do women overcome the stereotypes to be able to compete at a greater level if they are given the cold shoulder?
I disagree that paying up to the stereotypes and labels is a good idea. In my experience, it is the opposite. If we play up to them, would we not be making our lives in MMORPG harder later?
I have tried to be a member of a guild in various games that have been lead by men. In them, when it came time to do some guild activities, I found myself being overlooked because I am a girl. So, after putting in my time in other guilds, I found myself starting my own.
This prooved fruitless. My guild may do well, but guys will always find it difficult to admit that they are being lead by a female guildleader. It seems to be a shot to their ego.
So, my question to everyone is: Where do we draw the line at " becoming the stereotype"? How can we truely enjoy a game to it's fullest potential IF we are being pushed into a catagory that will limit how far we go?
I know personally I am tired of spending money on games that are MMORPG to discover that it is alright for me to do PVE but PVP type situations because they are " Beyond my capabilities" according to most men. I don't buy a game to play only 80% of it. I also don't get MMORPG games to be constantly hit on. I get a game to play it because I like it.
Most of you will go" Don't tell them you are a woman", but in todays MMORPG/ PvP games, you will be on a chat agent like Vent. Where you will be forced to communicate with your fellow gamers in order to be healed or to get help while being attacked. It's not easy.
Cheers everyone.
I can only count a handful of other female gamers that I know of inside my particular MMO on the server and faction I play.
I run a guild, as far as I am aware? None of the guys have a hard time admitting that they are in a guild run by a woman. The guild is meant to be a place for people to hang out, chat, have fun, and just maybe clear a few dungeons with like-minded individuals, no matter your age or gender or anything else for that matter.
Point taken. You're so great to make clear the advantage of breaking into WoW as opposed to gaming in general. Let's pretend for a minute that you're not a complete moron and social outcast (probably not a stretch at all, right) and look at what you said. I'll try not to attack you personally as a WoW player. You suggest that this website offer "real advice about how to get into WOW or something?" as opposed to "giving advice about "playing up to stereotypes" and how to break into gaming"... did you think first or just put down your cheetos and type? Sorry, I apologize, personal attack was unnecessary. MY point is, that was a dumb statement. Unless you were drunk or admitting that WoW is not "gaming" then you made a dumb mistake. Apologize for wasting the time of the thousands of people who read that posting and we'll forgive you.
-Tuts www.ballstarrecords.com (feel free to send hate mail)